Life & Career Coaching for Lawyers
Life & Career Coaching for Lawyers
There seems to be a general trend that experiencing emotions is not permitted especially among female professionals. That being emotional is a sign of weakness. It’s understandable that we don’t want to break down in tears at the office but what are you doing with those emotions once you leave for the day and does it matter?
As a coach and practicing attorney, I am no stranger to being annoyed by other humans. Recently, I found myself dreading a particular meeting that was planted right in the middle of my afternoon. Through a series of events, I learned to appreciate small irritations and approach them in a way that not only gave me peace but freedom and a greater understanding of myself.
As my clients learn to take more ownership over their feelings and their actions, one of the challenges they face is how to address negative experiences. Their immediate inclination is to shift to a new thoughts to try and feel better about the situation. But reality is that sometimes things will happen in our lives that we don’t want to feel good about. So what do we do?
One of the drawbacks of living in a society where everyone is so interconnected and everyone’s lives are constantly on display, is that it blurs the lines of reality. Not only do these outlets influence our beliefs about ourselves but they perpetuate the belief that we should be happy all the time.
How do we handle the bad days?
Ever reached for a glass of wine (or two) after a “really long day” to “take the edge off” or “wind down”? Ever plow through that whole package of Oreos because you were feeling lonely on a Friday night?
We are struggling. We are gaining weight, we are ignoring our best laid plans, we are skipping workouts, overeating, overdrinking and feeling blah.
Lately, my clients have been coming to me and they want help to stop these behaviors. They want to work on getting focused and motivated.
Do you ever feel confused about why you are not happier in your life?
You have a job that pays the bills. You have a home. You are healthy. You have family and friends who care about you.
Despite seemingly having all the ingredients to live a satisfied life, you just can’t seem to find happiness.
It always feels like something is missing or you catch yourself constantly wondering is this it?
Recently, I had a client ask me: Have you ever had a client that achieves all their goals and is just living the dream and happy?
She wanted me to say
Yes! I have made her life a dream. I can solve
ALL of your problems too, I promise. I can make you happy. I can make your life
happy.
But that wasn’t the truth. There is no happy ending. There is no happily ever after.
Why do we often reach for a glass of wine or another piece of cake when we are feeling stressed or had a bad day? Why is it so ingrained in our culture that having a glass of wine at the end of the day is how to best find relief from the day’s stress?
I started pursuing meditation as a means to find more peace in my work and home life. As any overachiever personality would do, I downloaded three meditation timers and ordered 10 meditation books and manuals. I wasn’t just going to meditate; I was going to be the BEST meditator. (Move over, Siddhartha.)