If I could teach my clients how to change other people, I would. You are never going to succeed in changing other people. So when it comes to other humans, coaching is largely about putting down the boxing gloves and walking out of the ring.
Should I Leave?
Everything in life is 50/50, yin and yang. But how does that apply to our careers? Are we supposed to settle? Should we be searching for a job that hits all the marks? How do you know when you are chasing the dragon and when you should accept shortcomings as simply “a part of life?”
They Don’t Like You
Humans are social animals. There is a part of us that is drawn to community. So when a seed is planted that we are not liked, it’s easy to become consumed with worries and fantasized arguments with others. Not only does this waste your energy in the moment, it’s typically unwarranted. When we get curious about our “I’m disliked” fantasies, we can uncover the root of the issue.
When Your Boss is the Villain…
Whenever we find our lives dripping in dramatics and heightened emotions, we must consider: which role are we playing?
Being On Call 24/7
Every time we answer late night phone calls and emails, we are expressing our values not only to ourselves but those around us. In that expression, others will learn to anticipate where they fall on your hierarchy of values. If they are at the top, they will keep coming at you 24/7. How to deal.
“Yes” Women
Finding yourself overworked and overwhelmed? Saying “yes” when you want to scream “no”? Why do we do this to ourselves and how do we stop the madness?!
Motivational Triad
When it comes to practicing law, our minds and our internal conversations will be our greatest assets. It won’t be the accolades and background that make or break your practice. It all comes down to your relationship with yourself and the internal discussions no one hears but you. Given this, it seems that the greatest tool we must understand and hone is that magical mind of ours. Specifically, why is it that our mind sometimes goes rogue and makes it seemingly impossible to move forward?
Blame
Just because our logic-reasoning skills have improved and we know that it’s not prudent to lie about things that are likely memorialized on camera, it doesn’t mean we have gotten any better at accepting the results of our actions. Most of us have just gotten really good at dressing our blame up in prettier clothing: victim clothing.
Toxic Beliefs
There are going to be people in your life who are going to challenge you. As an attorney, I can fully buy into the idea of toxic work environments and all the challenges that go along with them. But today, I want to back up the conversation one step and examine what it means for someone or some place to be “toxic”? What I have found is that this idea of “toxicity” is filled with more drama than fact.
Insecurity Delays
In a profession where the only feedback you typically get is negative feedback, how do you keep those experiences from making you paranoid?
